Did I ever tell you about how different life is going to be on the inside. I am about to begin school again this fall after a short 6 year break. I am concerned that I may not be college material after working in the “real world” for so long. I was pretty worried about all the people that I will meet who are scholars and so much smarter than I am. I was quite nervous on the day I went to meet with my advisor for the first time. These feelings of inadequacy were floating around my head that first day, until I entered the business building on campus and saw my first posted sign in Academia. I think I’ll do ok.

Door

You all probably know that my father has worked at BYU and for the Church for as long as anyone can remember, right? Well, when he heard the news, he was willing to go out and show some school spirit. Thanks Dad, for supporting me at the U.

Go Utes!

POTTER

It is time that you get to know your own heart. Take this test and let us see to which order you are destined.

The Sorting Hat

Good Luck!

All credit for this post is due to Mike and Heidi

Please read this message:

Those of you who have used this site to obtain your weekly dose of fun-filled entertainment should take note of the following changes:

1) It’s the end of the world as we know it.

2) I feel fine.

3) ThePasseys.com will no longer be a place for me, Tony, to rant and rave. Please refer to the new site located at www.tonypassey.com. This will be the new home for all of you who seek low grade comedy through mediocrity.

4) ThePasseys.com will continue as a web log dedicated to family values and the current events of Hollywood’s #3,467 family.

We hope that these new changes will not leave you feeling uncomfortable and estranged. The last thing we meant to do is leave a fish taste in your mouth.

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I just thought this would be a good time to read over the “Sunscreen Speech” again. Rock on Crystal Pepsi! Yeah!

______________________________________________

“If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be
it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proven by
scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable
than my own meandering experience… I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh, nevermind; you will not
understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded.
But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and
recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before
you and how fabulous you really looked….You’re not as fat as you
imagine.

Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as
effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing
bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that
never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm
on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing everyday that scares you.

Sing.

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with
people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes
you’re behind…the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with
yourself.

Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you
succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your
life…the most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they
wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year
olds I know still don’t.

Get plenty of calcium.

Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone.

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children, maybe
you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky
chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary…whatever you do, don’t
congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either – your
choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s. Enjoy your body,
use it every way you can…don’t be afraid of it, or what other people
think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever
own..

Dance…even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.

Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for
good.

Be nice to your siblings; they are the best link to your past and the
people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you
should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and
lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you
knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live
in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will
philander, you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize
that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were
noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund,
maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one
might run out.

Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you’re 40, it will
look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who
supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of
fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the
ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen..”

You should be willing visit the blog of another. Blogs are great because of the “man-behind-the-curtain factor”. People sit in front of their computer and write things that would otherwise be embarrassing or are too personal to share in a large group. Ironically, they are sharing their personal business with the largest group; the wide wide world of web. The truth is, that if all the lonely, blogging housewives out there in internet-land knew how many fat, naked, out-of-work older men in Ohio read their blogs, they might not post such personal information.

That being said, visit your local blog today!

I have listed a few on my blogroll.

Here are the photos from our recent Disney trip . (Click on thumbnails to view larger.)

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Have you ever met a person that is like a walking cartoon? I know several.

One of the great walking cartoons of our time is Dan. He’s like the Yogi Bear of 2008! Dan has often mentioned his aspirations of growing a mustache. Now as a Commercial Airline Pilot, naturally there is tremendous pressure for Dan to sport the blossomed lip. Pilot jobs are one of the 3 great “stache” jobs. There are Pilots, Police Officers, and Janitors. Interestingly enough, all three jobs pay the exact same compensation the first year on the job….

Here is Dan.

Danny Boy

Here is Dan’s Grandpa….You can obviously tell where he gets his inspiration.

Dan’s Pa

There are a few times in life when it would seem that a person shouldn’t be made to focus on the form of payment.

When you hire a contractor, usually you give some form of a down payment in most states. Upon completion of the work, however, you are presented with the bill in record time. Most people would agree that the fastest their contractor ever moves is when it’s payment time.

What if your Proctologist or OB/Gyn were so quick to present the bill, it just wouldn’t feel right. Or how about if Police Officers carried a credit card machine and offered to swipe your card on the spot. There are a handful businesses in this world that we don’t want to think about as a “real business”…

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Take a closer look!

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When I entered this mortuary I thought to myself, I hope they paid with their American Express and earned their bonus miles(!).

Strange.

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